Couples' Drama

You would think that couples looking to get involved with the swinging lifestyle would leave drama at the door. Unfortunately, that is not the case with the majority of couples. And, as you can imagine, the chances of drama multiply when you interact with a couple new to the lifestyle. Often, they don't even know what the lifestyle is about...

"Al" spoke to Rocco earlier in the week and indicated that he and his wife had been to a swing club in Long Island last weekend. They were there to see what the scene was about, and play in front of other people. They enjoyed it, but the fun stopped when, at the stroke of midnight, single guys were allowed into the club. Apparently, the club owner misrepresented that it was a "couples only" night, and a flood of single men came in when the owner wasn't satisfied with the amount of couples at the club. This is the problem when you have a non-swinger or money-hungry owner... couples and females don't feel safe and don't come back. How horrible.

Then, Al dropped the bomb. According to Rocco, Al asked him if I would "initiate" his wife. "Sable" was "shy" and Al didn't know how to get her comfortable. He indicated that "she was open to it" and that they had fantasized about another girl joining them. I don't think people understand, so I will say it again. Number one, I am sick of men who are trying to drag their girl into the lifestyle when the girl has absolutely no interest (as it turned out with Sable). Number two, I am not interested in "initiating" women who have no interest in this lifestyle. I hold "Swing School" sessions to counsel couples about the lifestyle. I guess, that's part of the problem -- "newbies" have no idea what the lifestyle involves... so here's a quick list of first-timer tips:

1) If you ONLY want to find another girl to bring into your bedroom, you are probably NOT a swinger.
2) Most swinger couples are comfortable with "full-swap," meaning that both partners swap. At the very least, swingers are comfortable with "soft-swap," meaning that both partners want to touch or perform oral sex with another couple.
3) When a female says "I'm open to another girl" that does NOT mean she's open to swinging, most times she is JUST saying that to satisfy her man.

Well, Al and his wife Sable were in the city and wanted to know if we'd like to go out to dinner. Usually, Rocco and I do not go out to dinner with people we don't know, but in this case -- let's just say we had something in common in our personal lives. We were not at all attracted to them, but we never hold that against people. Specifically, I wasn't attracted to Al because he was grossly overweight and a bit full of himself. Sable was OK, but she was very indifferent and removed.

Now, Rocco had told Al on the phone that I would not be the "initiator" that he wanted for his girl. Rocco specifically said that on a sexual level we look for full-swap couples. The soft swap thing might happen with a less experienced couple at a club or party, but the readers of this blog know, I want to fuck some cock. I like girls too, but when it comes down to it I want a man who knows how to fuck. I'm up front with what I want, but that doesn't mean I'll just take anyone. And I never push people. If a couple isn't ready... I just don't go there.

Due to a miscommunication, Rocco and I invited Al and Sable back to our place. I thought Rocco had some interest in Sable. Unfortunately, Rocco later told me that this was not the case. As you might predict, the rest of the night was a disaster. Al wound up taking Sable's breasts out and started playing with her. I gently touched her breast and even sucked her nipple. I was not trying to "initiate" her into the lifestyle, I was just in the moment. It was a little hard because I was so turned off by Al. Sable's reaction was... nothing.

I got kind of upset. At first I thought, was it me? Was I being rejected? Then, when the two of them started going at it... I realized, Sable did not want to be here. She was doing this for her man. She couldn't even LOOK at me, or Rocco. She was a dead fish, even while getting fucked... and I honestly felt bad for her.

Rocco and I attempted to do our own thing nearby. Unfortunately, we were both majorly turned off by the negative vibe. We just wanted the night to end. So Rocco and I both faked orgasms, and went to the shower. Before we knew it, they were gone.

As you can see, couples communication is essential in swinging. We made a grave mistake in inviting Al and Sable back to our place. I know the story was not really a turn on, but I'm writing this for a reason. Guys, please do not drag your girls out to swinger events or to meet other swinger couples. The whole evening reminded me of the typical "Craig's List dinner meet," where couples meet, go to dinner and either (1) do nothing or (2) have a horrible night because one of the girls have absolutely no interest in playing. Wasting another couples time is not cool... so please do not misrepresent the interests of both you and your partner. This is also a REALLY good reason to talk to the female on the phone before meeting, or even conversing.

To top all of that, we got an email from Al later that night. Of course, he knew something was off but wanted to know how to improve things "for our next meeting." Uhhh, next meeting??? He made the presumption that Rocco and I were both into them, and he assumed that we were offended that they didn't want to swap. This is what I meant before, this guy was FULL of himself. I've been with some HOT couples, but no -- I should have to beg people like Al and Sable for the chance to touch her boob! And I really wanted some of what Al had to offer.... yeah RIGHT!

I wasn't cruel enough to say that I wasn't into him (don't worry, he doesn't read the blog so all of these comments won't affect him -- he indicated at dinner that he isn't much of a blog reader and had no real interest in reading it), but I was pretty blunt in saying that Sable had turned me off after rejecting me. I also suggested that friendship and swing-partners may be mutually exclusive. He took that as a cue that we should retain friendship, and asked if we could fix things and remain "life-long friends." Not only that, but he insisted she WAS into it... "She said didn't mind when you touched her breast." Wow really??? She didn't mind?? I'm so turned on by the fact that she laid there with her eyes closed and didn't mind.... Sheesh! Keep fooling yourself, Al...
Ahhhh, the drama with these couples...

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